Knowing When To Shut Up - Part One

Sometimes, some words slip out of our mouths and it's too late to undo what we said. It's normal that we show reactions when someone triggers us and we get offended. Usually, we try to defend ourselves by hurting the other person back without processing what is happening at that moment. The question is Why shut up when it feels good to let it out? Because we feel like crap afterwards and wish we behaved differently. It's similar to craving for junk food, love eating every moment of it but feeling ashamed after. Sounds familiar?

So when is the right time to shut up?




1. When someone insults you

You have got to understand that hitting back only means that you are pulling yourself down to the same level with the other person. People insult others to feel better about themselves, that's poor thinking or not thinking at all! Insult or bringing other people down is a weakness. If you read the most successful people's biographies, you will realize that rarely any of them fired back. You should always act like a gentleman/lady if you want to become successful and respected. 

You simply don't need to be rude, instead:  

Learn to ignore and let it go. 
Learn not to be reactive but proactive. 
You define who you are, not others. 


According to dictionary, the antonym of reactive is IGNORANT. The more you ignore, the calmer your are going to feel. It's pretty damn hard to try at first, nobody said it was an easy change to make in your life. If it was easy, everyone would be successful.


2. Coming Soon, Stay Tuned :) 

Life is Too Short to End it - Dedicated to Robin WIlliams

"You'll have bad times, but it'll always wake you up to the good stuff you weren't paying attention to. "

 - Robin Williams in Good Will Hunting, 1997

 

As you already know, Robin Williams hanged himself. Sadly, he ended his life, the life that maybe most of us dream of having, who doesn't like to be as talented as him and to be loved by everyone in the world but ironically feeling lonely as hell. I was devastated when I heard  the news. I grew up with his movies, he was truly my idol, my main motivation to be fearless and to follow my dreams.




I connect to him a lot, I am surrounded by so many friends in my life but to be honest, I am lonely. I can openly say that there's no one single person that I would share everything in my life, someone with whom I can experience life with, share my life with...that's how I decided to become a writer, I used to write on papers to express my feelings, to share my feelings with a piece of paper, I just needed to get it out of my mind. It wasn't enough though! I started creating characters and express my feelings through stories and my characters, it indeed calmed me down, I ended stories the way I wanted not how it happened in real life, it pleased me.

They say that you need to be comfortable being all by yourself and true happiness is within you. It's true! You cannot depend on somebody else to conquer that, it's as simple as that and yet it's the hardest thing to do. It will hit you hard so many times when you're feeling low and you need someone by your side, feel someone's existence that you're not alone. Not everyone can find him/her, if you already have that person in your life, you are on of the luckiest people on earth.

The key is to love yourself. You need to value yourself, it was one of the biggest challenges of my life to love myself. ( I will talk more about how to love yourself later.) You need to realize that it's not an easy task just to love who you are when you know that you don't! It takes practice and experience and it takes a lot of effort to get there! It's even harder for those who put themselves last in every situation!

The easiest temporary solution to forget the whole subject is drinking and using drugs. Who doesn't like not thinking about reality for a while? The question is, then what? are the problems really gone? you're back to reality before you know it ...BAM!!! it hits you again and that's how you become an alcoholic or drug addict. I'm not saying everyone turns into an alcoholic because of this reason. I'm saying that it's a damn good reason to become one without realizing it! You can use all the existing distractions all your life not to focus on yourself and keep fooling yourself.

You have two choices, whether start loving who you are, improving yourself, and losing a lot of weight off of your shoulder and feeling lighter or let it stick around for years until you hate yourself until you decide to end your life regardless whose life you're affecting after you're gone. Maybe you think nobody cares about you but your existence still affects someone else's without you knowing it. Please note that I'm not judging Robin Williams, I can't even imagine what it feels like to be that depressed to commit suicide. This article is about loving yourself and choosing the right path and if ever you experience being out of control, you need to seek professional help. Always remember that Life is too short to end it! 
 

“ You need to truly have life experience to understand what life fully has to offer. You can’t learn everything from reading it in books. You need to feel life. You need to feel the sun on your face, and experience relationships. get out there and live your life! You need to make mistakes, you need to get dirty, you need to meet new people! don’t live behind your books, or your school work. those things are great, but there is only so much you can learn inside of 4 walls. go out there and live your life!” 

– Robin Williams

Let Go & Move On

 We all have some ugly memories that never leave us alone. Some bad news, breakups, divorces, deaths, bad people, etc..we try our best to avoid it as much as possible but anything could trigger it as it just happened... the pain is so fresh that ruins the rest of your day...or maybe your week...next thing you know is that you've been trying to deal with this your whole life and you still can't get over it.

Unfortunately, we barely recall good memories. Bad News is like a poison, it needs to get out of your system or it kills you. The biggest reason is that we try to figure out what happened that it happened or how it happened...analyzing it over and over again in our heads. We practice it whenever we get a chance, as a result, it becomes a part of us like a habit. You got to understand that nobody feels good about it, but there's nothing that could be done about it.

One helpful strategy is that you need to face the fact when it happens. You need to digest the information first. You need to feel the pain physically and mentally through your whole body, it hurts SO bad but it's better than hurting for life. Take a few minutes for yourself, let it all out...deal with it. This strategy helps you getting it out of your system right away. You will realize how much it can help you, you automatically won't think about it as often as you used to and therefore, it won't become a part of you.

Unleash The Inner You

Hi everyone!

Welcome to "The Inner Vous"!!!
As you already know, vous means "you" in French and I think we cover up this part of us pretty well. How many times have you felt that being you is wrong? Like expressing some sort of feelings, acting in different way to cover what's happening inside. What is really within us? underneath us?

We act in a certain way, for some reasons, and we limit ourselves from being who we really are. Don't you think? We already know this, there's nothing new to tell. Think about if we unleashed the inner us, what would happen? Not caring what others say, not caring if we fail, not caring what happens next...

I started this blog to share useful resources and learn from great minds like YOU! We don't need to be famous to inspire others. We can simply inspire each other. Sometimes you connect more with strangers than those
who see us every single day. Message me if you feel the same ;)  

-NS